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Where I make thinly-veiled masturbation references in an attempt to be sincere

September 12, 2011

Over the weekend, I ended up flipping around channels and Tosh.0 came up. Now, I’m not the biggest fan of “let’s make fun of people” shows, and much of Tosh.0 is just that, but I really like his “web redemptions,” where he’ll bring back the butt of some internet video to figure out just what was going through his/her mind and give him/her a chance to cast themselves in a better light.

In this episode, Tosh had brought back this very optimistic girl. When you watch her video, you can’t help but love yourself – she’s that contagious.

Anyway, later that day, I ended up explaining the concept of Healthy At Every Size (HAES) to someone who was looking to drop a lot of weight quickly. Basically, what I wanted to convey was that nobody is truly happy with their body and you can’t ever get discouraged because of it. At the heart, I ended up delivering a part “the journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step” and part “take time to smell the roses” diatribe. Essentially – accept the present, because there’s nothing you can do about it, and try to gear yourself toward “better” for the future, however you want to define that “better.” If that means “thinner,” than so be it, but strive for “as healthy as possible” for the present.

All of this ended up toward a bit of self-love1 . . . what are the things about you, right now, that you love? Because, we all know that a voyage of a thousand miles is a whole lot easier when you’re traveling with company that loves you2

So – name those things that you love about yourself, in the here & now. Things don’t need to be physical, though physical characteristics are certainly not to be ignored. When you’re done, come back here & link up. Because, as you well know, here, we’re all about the self-love.

Click here to enter your link and view this Linky Tools list…

My list, in no particular order:

  1. My writing – I like to write, and people like to read what I’ve written. It’s a good combination.
  2. My smile – some say that my smile is really great, and to them, I allow their opinion (I’d rank it as a little above average). However, I do know that my smile is very quick to find its way to my face (which maybe puts it as better than average).
  3. My legs – even when I was much less-fit than I am right now, I had pretty stellar legs. If my choice is to walk or to pick up the phone at work, I walk. I seldom sit still. Now that I’m cycling and running and trying to always ensure I’m in motion, well, my legs look good.
  4. My fingers – everything about me starts with my fingers. They’re long & slender & scarred from various scrapes, dings & you-name-its. They press the keys that write this post. They press the keys that make music. I love to touch, and they’re the instrument that allows me to touch. They do . . . . other things best left unsaid in a blog post. Honestly, I think I could live more easily without my eyes than I could without my fingers.
  5. My ears – no, not the way they look. I think all ears are silly looking, and mine are especially so. But, I’ve learned to listen well – when I read, I assign voices to everybody (yes, each of you bloggers whose blogs I hang around, I have a voice assigned to you . . . when you vlog, sometimes I’m shocked by how spot-on I was, more often, I have to stop & sit and reconcile the differences between the voice you’ve been assigned and the voice you speak with). So, my reading is much like I am when I’m listening . . . and be it a story, a heart-pouring, or a concerto — I’m a talented listener.

1 No, that is not a masturbation reference, you pervert.
2 What, you don’t have a constant inner monologue whenever leave your house like I do?
  1. Ok, since this just came through my email, I’m doing it! Gah! Great challenge, and yes, scarey.

  2. My inner monologue never. stops.

    And how? HOW? Did you know I was looking for just such a thing? Healthy is not where I’ve been, and I’ve sort of lost sight of the things I like best about me.

    A little self-love will just hit the spot.

    • I linked up, too. Thanks, you.

    • I think there were a lot of people looking for this. The prompt for this was a very specific incident with someone who is going through a whole heck-of-a-lot right now, but I think there is a general “woe is me” going about.

      I love your list.

  3. I have the hardest time trying to be positive to myself. Something im really trying to work on for the sake of my kids. love your list.

    • I think we all have issues keeping ourselves positive – with little ones in the house now, though, I’m trying extra hard to keep the mutterings under-my-breath to myself, because I don’t want to pass them on.

  4. Laura permalink

    Since I don’t blog, I couldn’t figure out how to use the link. I love this idea though! Accentuate the positive!
    Here’s my list:
    1. I love my positive attitude
    2. I love that I can cook, I’m no gourmet, but I can get a decent, healthy, from-scratch (for the most part) meal on the table at any time.
    3. I love my arms. They are slender and muscular.
    4. I love my ability to talk to people (most people anyway). It is something that I have learned over the years. I used to be terrible at it.
    5. I love my emotions, I love that I can cry, laugh, love; the only thing I really can’t do is hold a grudge, and I guess that’s another thing I love about myself.

    Thanks for this exercise, John!

    • I love your list Aunt Laura!

      I’ve been cooking more & more – I’m actually working into the ranks of “pretty good,” if I do say so myself.

  5. This is so important.

    WHen I stop and think about the source of any dislike I have for myself: it’s my fault.

    i let this small town of women who won’t accept me, determine my worth.

    I have built my own community online.

    Some say that’s not right, I should not escape real life.

    I don;t think it’s running from, I think it’s running to.

    • I have the hardest time accepting the fact that anyone wouldn’t accept you, Empress. You’re smart, you’re funny, you’re sincere, and judging by the pics I’ve seen of you from BlogHer, you’re damn hot.

      ANYWAY, we love you for you. But you already knew that.

      Don’t let small-town whateverthehellyoucallits get you down.


  6. I love that i can use this as my blog prompt for Wednesday 🙂

    • And I love that I now get your blog posts delivered to my email inbox!

      Thanks for taking part 🙂

  7. My brain, my garden, my food.

    Awesome post, John. We all need to be reminded of our positive qualities.

    • Your garden and your food make my mouth water, regularly.

      Your brain keeps us coming back for more 🙂

      Thank you.

  8. Lance permalink

    I just did something similar for my birthday on Saturday but I like your attitude.

    1) my writing.. It starting to not suck.

    2) my parenting. Its starting to not resemble something on the Jerry Springer show.

    3) my committment to my wife as her best friend. She gets everything first. That’s not a masterbation reference either.

    4) My mind. It’s more open, liberal, less judgemental, and full of wonder than it’s ever been.

    5) my rack…wait, that being done all over the innerwebz right now…oh yeah, my guitar playing. It’s not horrible anymore.

    • Um, dude – I read your blog. Your writing hasn’t sucked for as long as I’ve been reading it.

      I actually have tales from my past that Jerry Springer would discount as “unbelievable” and refuse to air, so I figure as long as there aren’t too many “dad screwing the orthodontist” tales in my kids’ lives, I’m ahead of the curve.

      I didn’t know you were a guitar player – I have grand plans to create some sort of blogger band at a convention some day.

  9. I love the way you wrote about your ears – not as a body part but as a metaphor for what they represent as a whole…

    I probably could use some work on my listening skills.

    So well done by you.

    • Thank you, you.

      Yeah, ears are silly looking – but they allow you to listen, and once you can listen, you can be so much more.

  10. I am going to try to get to this tomorrow! I need something like this!


    • Get to it when you can — you take care of yourself, and your lady bits, for now!

  11. Deborah the Closet Monster permalink

    #3 made me cheer! Even when there wasn’t anything else about myself that I liked, I always loved my calves. I’ve found a few other things since, which I’ll devote an entry to if I can manage to get caught up on comments! *cough*

    This is rockin’ 🙂

    • I was pretty majorly obese my junior year of college (I’m really tall, so a lot of people never saw just how obese I was, but I was) and I was dating this girl who really wasn’t nice to me (I very nearly married her because, well, when you’re not happy with yourself, anyone who gives you any attention, at all, is good). I remember walking somewhere with her, talking about how I was looking to lose some weight and maybe gain some muscle, and she mentioned that muscle was good, because I had good legs.

      And about those comments — are you calling me long-winded? Someone needs to stop writing posts which call for prolific comments in return. :-p

      • Deborah the Closet Monster permalink

        Definitely not calling you long-winded! I keep on feeling like I might just get caught up on comments on TMiYC when I go and post an unplanned entry (like last night), getting me way behind the curve again. *shakes fist at self*

  12. Ummmm
    What do I love? That I dance and sing around the house with my kids.
    That I have done so much with my life.
    That I make breakfast for dinner sometimes. Because life needs variety keep it interesting.
    That I try to focus on what matters, not so much the money or things.
    That I am a damn good nurse. I listen. I advocate. I teach.
    Physical? That’s harder. That I can run. If only 3 miles, I can do it. My shoulders. My height: tall is rad.

    Also, I make up voices AND imagine people’s lives. The scenery (office, home, etc). And what do you think I sound like? .

    • Oh, Lisa – you had me at Brinner.

      I’ve no doubt about just how great a nurse you are, as that “I listen” is evident which most everything we see from you.

      My kids aren’t yet embarrassed by my dancing around the house – so they try to sing & dance with me as a I do it. Oh, how I hope that’s always the case.

      Tall is, most certainly, rad. I’m curious – are you taller than my 6’4″? I dated a girl, very briefly, who was taller than me . . . she was also clinically insane, so we made quite the couple.

      Your voice, in my head, is this weird mix of British nanny, surfer girl, and ultra-granola hippie. For a woman, it’s a low voice (this is my rationalization of your height, I think), but it quickly gets high pitched & feverish when you get excited.

  13. I love reading what others love about themselves, but writing about what I love about myself…hmmmm I’ll have to think about it because I have a heck of a lot of negativity swirling around right now.

    • The person I was talking to wasn’t the only one with a whole lot of negativity. For as much as I love this weather, as the weather gets colder, I focus more on the stuff I don’t like about myself. No idea why – but, with the kids paying more attention to me, it needs to stop.

      I’ll agree, though – it’s wonderful to read other people’s lists . . . but coming up with my own was really, really hard.

  14. Such a great challenge. I’m jumping on board. But it’s definitely something to think about! Yours is all deep and inspirational 😉

    • Well, thank you very much!

      I’m truly having a blast reading what others are writing about themselves.

Trackbacks & Pingbacks

  1. Loving Yourself : A list : Baby Feet
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  3. Whatever Wednesday: Love Thyself | My Postpartum Voice
  4. Where I bring the random on a Friday, yet again. « The Adventures of Daddy Runs a Lot
  5. I Love ME. « *straight talk jess*

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