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Where I give y’all a pop quiz

September 7, 2011

With all due apologies to KLZ of Taming Insanity, I’m stealing her “Quiz” gimmick, because I find it humorous.

  1. Leila has been chewing on her sleeve a lot recently, this means:
    1. She’s teething
    2. She’s all kinds of weirded-out that she’s actually wearing sleeves, as we just pulled out the fall wear
    3. She really, really digs the barbecue-sauce-flavored laundry detergent we’re using
    4. She’s my kid, and therefore needs no reason to do what she does.
  2. I have a series of really epic “make myself tired” events coming up, but I’m most excited about:
    1. The Hershey Half-Marathon, because I’m running with my sister
    2. The Harrisburg marathon, because the course absolutely kicked my ass last year
    3. Run For Your Lives, because, hello? zombies!
  3. I thinking about, right now:
    1. The pile of work that I have to get done
    2. Where I’m going to find materials to build an ark with, because it’s been raining like crazy and animals are starting to line up
    3. You
    4. Boobs
  4. Church choir starts up on Sunday, so #inappropriateChurchTheater needs:
    1. More references to boobs
    2. More references to complex fingerings leading to a slow crescendo before blossoming into a nirvana-like release that leaves all parties breathless.
    3. More uncensored pictures of my hands on my organ
    4. To end, because it’s a silly, juvienille practice and, frankly, below me
    5. If you read that previous answer aloud, it sounds like I end it with “blow me”
  5. CJ has been showing more & more interest in Star Wars. This is because:
    1. Star Wars is a franchise that attracts people of all sorts due to a timeless story (if meddling dialog)
    2. Laser blasts and Ewoks may be the only things that can hold a toddler’s attention
    3. His parents are unabashed geeks and you don’t live with that much geek and not have it rub off on you
  6. My daughter has this habit of blinking her eyes & trembling her lower lip. Before she’s 10, I will:
    1. Have bought her a pony and will be working 7 jobs in order to support the second pony that I’ve promised
    2. Learned to ignore this tactic of hers.
    3. I’m laughing, heartily, at the previous answer.
  7. Speaking of my daughter, her hair is just getting long enough to do stuff with, which means I need to learn to:
    1. Put hair into a ponytail
    2. Put hair, evenly, into pigtails
    3. French-braid hair
    4. Braid pigtails
    5. Keep any/all forms of scissors away from CJ
    6. All of the above
  8. I’m much quicker to put one kid in timeout when they’ve “made a bad decision” that directly affected the other child because:
    1. It’s important that brother & sister learn to be lifelong friends, even at this early age.
    2. It’s really freaking cute when they hug to say they’re sorry when they leave timeout
  9. I really want, right now:
    1. A beer
    2. Bottled Sleep
    3. A bottle of wine
    4. A backrub
    5. Something else that starts with “b”
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15 Comments
  1. This is excellent! Let me answer:
    1: i/ii
    2: iii, NO question
    3: ii/and duh, iv
    4: all of the above, needs to be a choice.
    5: iii – but that should read ‘his dad.’
    6:i, most definately
    7:vi
    8: ii, same here
    9: again, all of the above!!

    • Yeah, I certainly geared this one to be mostly “all of the above” πŸ™‚

  2. What does it say about me that I want to answer all of the above to each of these questions?

    More importantly, what does it say about you?

    Hmmmm….

    • What is says about me is that I like to make people smirk more than I like to make people think – but you knew that πŸ™‚

  3. Heh, I’m with Julie!

    And also, since I’m pretty sure I know the answer to all of these, let me just say: I like the way you think.

    • You like the way I think because you & I, I believe, share a brain. :-p

  4. If answer 1-iii was bacon-flavored instead of BBQ, I so would have chosen that one.

    • See – my “not eating meat” makes bacon-flavored stuff difficult in my house πŸ™‚

  5. Galit Breen permalink

    Fun! I’ll play:

    1. iv Hee!

    Well, I started to play but my answers started saying things like “boobs” and “blow me” so there you go- now you know! πŸ™‚

    • Welcome to my world… “boobs” / “blow me”, and it’s all downhill from there πŸ˜‰

  6. Loved this post….but ya – keep any and all scissors away from the children because I can guarantee you the only thing you will be getting that starts with a b is a butt kick if there is a hair cutting incident on your watch.

    • Oh, believe me Poppy, I know. I’m more concerned with creating very, very uneven pigtails, though. CJ is actually a really, really sweet kid, and I think he’d be more upset about cutting Leila’s hair than Leila would be about having her hair cut.

      Actually, thinking on this, I should be more worried about Leila cutting her own hair.

  7. I’m with Mads and Galit on the “all of the above” to all of the above.

    Could you perhaps send your monsoon our way? We desperately need it.

    With regards to little girls hair: game over man. Game over.

    May the force be with you.

    The power of the schwartz too.

    And by Grabthar’s hammer, by the suns of Warvan, you shall be avenged!

    Prepare for starburst – not the one with fruit flavor.

    Engage.

    Nope.. not a geek at all…

    • Did you just pull out Galaxy Quest on me!

      And I thought I loved you before.

      If I had any control over the weather, I’d send this damn rain out Texas way . . . the constant rain really isn’t any fun.

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